Learning to Listen

Have you ever said something and immediately wished you could take it back? You weren’t really thinking about what you said when you said it, but as soon as it came out of your mouth, you wished you had taken the time to think about what you were going to say before you said it? I know that I have and I’m sure you have too. I’ve also had it where I’ve said something that seemed right at the time, but after a while I realized that it wasn’t and wished that I could take it back. Sometimes it’s because I didn’t stop to think before I spoke, and other times it’s because I didn’t stop to listen before I spoke. That can really make things uncomfortable — when a response doesn’t even make sense because I wasn’t actually listening is super embarrassing to me. Why? Because I know better.

I was taught James 1:19, which says, “…let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger;” and have heard it used many times. It makes a lot of sense and we would all be wise to follow it — sometimes it’s really hard to though. Something I hadn’t really thought about, regarding this concept, was being quick to listen to God before I spoke. I do think to listen for Him when I’m asking Him for something — although I’m often quite impatient in those moments if I’m being honest — but not necessarily before I speak to people. I’ve also thought to ask Him for guidance when I know I’m about to have a difficult conversation with someone, but not in my everyday conversations. I was reading Oswald Chambers devotional “My Utmost for His Highest” and was struck by a question in it.

Chambers asks, “Are you learning to listen to God before you speak, or are you saying things and then trying to make God’s Word fit what you have said?” I had to reread it a couple of times because when I first read it, I thought the answer was an easy “yes”, but the more I read it, the more I realized that it wasn’t. I think that it can be super easy to speak without listening — maybe even use some Christian language/phrases that we’ve heard a lot to help us out. We might think we’re saying something helpful, but in reality, that isn’t always the case. I think there’s a way to greatly reduce the number of times we do this. If we actually took the time to listen — really listen — to God, He would give us the right words to use in our conversations.

The more we know Him, the more we are able to recognize His voice. The stronger our relationship — the more time we spend with Him — the easier it will become. It reminds me of the relationship between a mother and her baby. Babies are born knowing their mothers’ voice. After spending months in the womb listening to it, it is easily recognizable among all the other voices in the world because they know the sound of that particular voice. I think that’s a picture of how our relationship with God should be. That our relationship is so close that we know the sound of His voice above any other voice we hear.

When we are able to be disciplined enough to listen to God before we speak — and then do what He says — we will be able to speak with wisdom. Psalm 37:30 says, “The mouth of the righteous utters wisdom, and his tongue speaks justice.” Another verse like that one is Proverbs 31:26, which says, “She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.” Our tongues are very powerful — they hold the power of life and death (Prov. 18:21). Our words mean something and we would all be wise to think and pray before we speak, that we might speak truth and wisdom. I used to hear a quote growing up in VBS that went, “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can break my heart.” So true!

The wisdom found in thinking before we speak can truly be life changing! The more we grow our relationship with God, the more like Jesus we become. The more we allow Him to transform us and grow us, the more good fruit we bear. Galatians 5:22-23 says, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control…” These are fruits that I want to bear in my life. These are good fruits that grow as a result of the Spirit’s work in our lives. The more we become like Jesus, the more these fruits will be seen in our lives. Romans 12:2 says, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” How will we learn to discern the will of God? By growing in our relationship with Him and learning to hear His voice above all the others.

Are you learning to listen to God before you speak, or are you saying things and then trying to make God’s Word fit what you have said? Does being quick to listen and slow to speak come naturally for you or do you have to work at it?

Song(s) of the Week: This week I chose “Speak Life” by Toby Mac. Enjoy!