Blessings

Do you ever think about all of the blessings in your life? Do you ever find yourself looking for them? I think that it can be easy to take our blessings for granted and it can be easy to forget to look for them when things are hard. There is physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental pain that can sometimes lead us to question where the blessings are in that moment. I know that’s true in my life. When I’m in the midst of a struggle it doesn’t usually “feel” like a blessing in any way. There is a battle that occurs within me and unless I allow God to use use my struggle as a lesson, it feels completely pointless. One thing I’ve noticed is that if I ask God to teach me something, He will — it might not be what I thought He was going to teach me, but it’s always something that I need to learn.

I didn’t feel like writing this week. I’ve had hip pain off and on throughout the last few weeks and while I know it’s pregnancy related, it still hurts. Morning sickness has reared it’s head and the weather has felt like whiplash — sunshine one day, snow and freezing temperatures the next. I have had feelings of failure in a couple different areas and all in all just felt like skipping this week altogether. I told myself that no one would care if I did and while that may or may not be true — I would care. I would know that I skipped and it would bother me, so I prayed while I was putting my little guy to bed last night that God would teach me something and give me something that I wanted to write about — and He did.

I was rocking my little guy, feeling miserable from my hip pain, and on the verge of tears as I asked Him what I was suppose to be learning. Within a couple of minutes the story of when Jacob wrestles with God came to mind. Jacob didn’t receive his blessing until after he wrestled. There was a struggle that led up to the blessing and when the struggle was ending, Jacob’s hip was put out of socket (Genesis 32:25). Jacob experienced hip pain before he received his blessing. God could have easily appeared to Jacob and blessed him without any struggle involved, but I’m sure the event and the blessing was much more meaningful to Jacob because of the struggle. Sometimes our biggest blessings come after we’ve been through a struggle. Sometimes they come after we’ve experienced pain. Sometimes those are the most memorable blessings because they didn’t come “easy” for us. There was labor, toil, heartache, pain, uncertainty, confusion, anger, misunderstanding — a battle before the blessing.

That’s how I feel right now. I feel like I’m in a “battle before the blessing” season and while it’s terribly uncomfortable at times I know that as long as I keep holding onto Jesus, there will be blessings just like Jacob (Genesis 32:26). The struggle might last for a night, but when morning comes there will be a blessing — even if I don’t know what it will be, I know that there will be one. Blessings don’t always look like blessings in the moment — sometimes we have to look hard because sometimes our blessings look like disappointment, failure, pain, tears, heartache, sleepless nights, and so on. God can see things that we cannot and He knows more than we ever will. Sometimes He uses the hardest moments of our lives to show us His way and His plans for our lives. He is a good Father and He will not waste any moments of our lives. He can make beauty from ashes and He can make blessings flow from our deepest pain. What a loving Father He is that He takes the time to teach each of us and to bless each of us in unique ways — even through our hardest moments.

I know that I’m not done with the hip pain yet and the feelings of failure aren’t going to suddenly disappear simply because I made this realization. What I do know is that God is faithful and He will continue to walk with me and hold me through the pain, struggle, and heartache. He will continue to pursue me and love me in this battle and He will continue to teach me and show me the blessings along the journey. I also know that when this current season of struggle comes to an end, I will be able to find the blessings I may have missed in the moment because He is such a good Father.

Have you ever experienced an event or season of life that was difficult that you can now look back on and see the blessings? Have you ever had blessings that came through pain, tears, sleepless nights, trials, etc.?

Song(s) of the Week: This week I chose “Blessings” by Laura Story because I think it fits in perfectly with this topic. Enjoy!